Thoughts about house cleaning

Just needed to write about that.

I noticed something important this morning while discussing (little violently) with my mother. After that discussion I took my bus to go at school and I started thinking.

How many of us are cleaning house by their own? Like washin' dishes and all. I guess few of you do, not everyone. The question is: is it normal???

All of this depends on the parents, there is a right and a wrong way to educate children so they clean things alone, and one of the way many parents, including my mother, are doing, is always criticate the work we do.

As for example, I'm washing dishes, drying them, and placing them, and then I'm pround and I'm telling to myself that my mother is gonna be habppy because she won't have everything to do and all. She asked me to do so, and it's done... But then she arrives and she's like looking at the kitchen and she's like, mad as hell and screaming: ­"The kitchen haven't bee done!!!" and then I'm like "Hum, wtf, yeah I did it, I washed dishes as you asked me, thought you'd be happy!" and then she answers to me that it's not clean AT ALL because there are things left like papers or little things and she's telling me how bad I am and that I could have done better and eveything and that I should see things by myself.

She's doing this since I'm 10 years old, that each time I try to help her by washing dishes, or placing cothes or whatever, washing clothes and all, she's never never never satisfied, there is always something else that I could have done. If I washed clothes correctly, then I could have also washed dishes, if I did both, then I could have cleaned my room. If I did all those things, then, I could have clean my brother's room (WTF!!!) I mean, this is really getting me crazy. After that, where can I find any motivation about washing things in the house and "seeing things by myself" as she says? Is is surprising that I'm not helping so much in my house about cleaning??? It's not encouraging AT ALL, and that makes everyone mad. And it's the same day after day, nothing changes, she's always mad, and i'm never cleaning stuff except when she asks, and because of that she's telling me that I'm irresponsible and all. It's not because I don't clean so much that I' irresponsible or whaterver, it' just really useless till it's never enough, never perfect, so whatever if I'm cleaning or not, she's mad at me.

Though, the situation is very different at my job, Im'm like part of the ones, even If I'm not working there since a long time, that cleans the best, and see the more things to do, seriously - my collegue is like very impressed by things and all, so means It's not that I'm unable to wash and I don't see things, because it's really not the case, it really is about the fact I never do correctly, even if I spend an hour to wash the kitchen or the bathroom, so I stop doing things so clean cause anyway I can't get her happy!!!

Just want to know what you think about that, what could I do, and how it's working for you? Like how your parents are with you about cleaning, and how much cleaning you do and everything related to this. I'd be happy finding any solution or other ways to work, knowing If I'm alone living that kind of situation or not.

Its good to start but barely anyone dose all their own cleaning tell mid 20s. I know people who live two hours away at college, but drive a few times a week back home so their parents will do their laundry.

I do my laundry, clean (sort of), and sometimes do the dishes. I also make dinner once a week (I would do it more often, but my mom likes doing it).

But last year, and all the years before I did nothing around my house, and got into verbal fights with my parents, then agreed to do it, but never got around to it.

write her a poem. if that doesn't work get her to drink a cup of oil and vinaigrette

DO IT

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what Tyrlop?

Hmm I really don't know what to say about this. I'm sorry you have to put up with that. I think it's pretty normal for parents to give their children chores around the house, but your mother's attitude towards how you do these chores doesn't sound normal at all. I would suggest reasoning with her, but that sounds farfetched when dealing with a person who seems quite unrational. I've heard of people purposely doing a horrible job so they aren't asked to do that task again... maybe that could work?

At least you're close to being out of the house, right? Then you can throw off the yoke of tyranny that oppresses you so

Hang tough Lilith.

My mother is just as maniatic about cleaning the house. Our major conflicts have actually been regarding to this even more than me leaving university.

When asked to clean something, I simply won't do it. I hate to be told what to do. If I don't clean by my own initiative it's simply because I have other higher priority stuff to do and since house cleaning is often of the least priority, then I usually leave it for the last moment.

My mother, on the other hand, cannot stand that the dishes stay a couple of hours on the sink - she requires them to be done at once. If they're not clean within the first two hours of use, she'll start washing them and blaming everyone else for doing nothing to clean the house. The worst part is that my mother actually doesn't even know well how to wash the dishes and they end up dirty just now where the rest of the clean or "pseudoclean" dishes are.

I have the theory that many parents require to have the feeling that things are clean. They may not even care about thing being actually clean - all they need is the psychological satisfaction that things have been done. Except perhaps in some extreme cases where dirt is too noticeable.

Another theory I have is that several of our parents actually live by the paradigm that "better broken than clean", that is, they prefer things to be clean rather than functional this being a reflection of themutting "cleanness" as one of the main priorities if not the main.

I agree with Zealot, their have been times where I've decided Im going to clean, but then some one yells at me to do it (my mom, dad, or brother) and I decide not to.

Liche wrote:

I agree with Zealot, their have been times where I've decided Im going to clean, but then some one yells at me to do it (my mom, dad, or brother) and I decide not to.

It's like if they discredited your own initiative and will to do it, as if you needed to be commanded on what to do and as if you did not know when it's most convenient for you to do it.

exactly.

Another thing is, I hardly do my laundry (I do now) because I know if I dont my mom will do it with out me asking. Its like toddlers getting potty trained, why use a toilet when your wearing diapers?